So much done, so much to do, just to leave!

What a whirlwind process it has been! I way under estimated how long it would take to finish packing the house, how much space we’d take in the truck, how long the final cleaning would take, and how many times we’d make a “final” trip to the dump with trash and recycling. Thank goodness for the friends who came to help load the truck, and for the love and patience of my wife and folks, who said take your time, do it right and don’t stress it, and get here when you get here.

I keep thinking that once I get [to Lexington, to Cincy, to staging…] that I can breathe and feel like I’ve gotten everything done. But I haven’t reached that point yet. The list of “things to do before we go” has definitely shrunk, but there are an amazing number of items still on it, considering we leave for staging in four days.

One of the items on the list of last things to do were a couple of questionnaires from the PC. They wanted to know about our preferences so they could identify a host family for training, and about our goals and such in PC. Yes, we’d already filled out most of those goals in previous essays, but it probably isn’t a bad idea to get an updated version with our feelings a week before we get there instead of a year out, when we put the “right words” in there to be accepted. :) And it did make me think; what do I want to get out of PC time, personally and professionally. What is my biggest fear? What could make me come back?

For the first, I said learning Spanish and always being proud to be able to say, “I served in the Peace Corps.” For my biggest fear, I had two: getting sick enough to have to come back (like Jason did), after all the planning and arrangements for two years of being gone and all the looking forward to serving; and losing a loved one while we are gone. April and I both lost a much loved grandfather last year, which gave us some long discussions about family and what might happen in the next two years. We love our family and we will miss them for two years, and it means a lot to have them supporting us as we assist others less fortunate in their initial circumstances of where they were born.

Related to that, there is a website where PCVs from around the world, as well as invitees, can discuss about their assignments, what to bring, what to do, etc, called ThirdGoal.com. We posted there in the Panama section a couple of times. I just came across a really interesting post there, from a couple of years ago, but I think it describes how the Peace Corps compares to the “real world” (whether US or host country) pretty well. If you have ten minutes, it is a worthwhile read. http://www.thirdgoal.com/ottojones/2005/12/12/posh-corps/#comments

(The Third Goal of the Peace Corps is to share information back to folks in the US who haven’t had the opportunities PCVs have to see the rest of the world about what that world is like, how other people live and survive and thrive, perceive the US, and those of us from the US. It is the one goal that we will continue to work on for the rest of our lives, long after goals one and two – assist the host country, and be impacted ourselves by our service there – have been completed.)
kevin

How to mail to a PCV in Panama

We still don't know exactly where we'll be for training, but they say it can take a month for us to get mail from the States, and up to two months to get mail back to you, so if you want to write, send it now, be patient – and definitely put a date on your letters! It is also strongly recommended that you number your mail so we know if we missed one. :)

Sending mail/via USPS:
April Cropper PCV (or Kevin Cropper PCV)
Cuerpo de Paz/Panamá
0834-02788 Entrega General
Panamá, República de Panamá

Sending FedEx/UPS/etc:
Cuerpo de Paz
Edif. 95, Ave. Vicente Bonilla
Ciudad del Saber, Clayton
Panamá, República de Panamá
Tel: 507-317-0038, Fax: 507-317-0809
Attention: April Cropper PCV (or Kevin Cropper PCV)

They recommend sending padded envelopes if possible instead of boxes, which are taxed and opened more frequently.

Reality starts to sink in

It happened today…the reality of what is happening sunk in in a way that hit me in the pit of my stomach. The reality that we are doing something different than normal, how do I say it….that we are stepping outside the normal boundaries that have defined our life up to now.

I expected it to happen when our house of 8 years…our first house...was empty and we had to close it and drive away, but that just felt like a normal move. Sad yes, but normal. I expected it when I left work, when I went to goodbye parties, when I packed my dishes, when we loaded the truck, and when we sold the car. Don’t get me wrong….each of those moments were big. Each had real emotional impact, but they did not yet step outside the realm of other past experiences. For example, when I collected stuff to pack for Panama, it felt like packing for a trip or vacation.

So what finally brought it home? Kevin and I are at Mom & Dad Cropper’s house right now. They are graciously storing some of our furniture and clothing (they get ½ my parents are graciously taking the other ½). Some of what they are storing is our bed and dressers. We set up the bed in a corner of their basement and that is when it hit me. Strange, but for some reason seeing my bed set up in the basement crossed some line in reality for me. There was no reason to set up my bed there if I was going to be using it in the near future. I wasn’t going to live there in the basement so why set up my bed there?

It was an action that did not fit in to the other emotional scenarios that every other recent milestone had fit into – moving, taking a trip or changing jobs. My furniture being set up there was outside the previously normal…and connected to a new reality…and being on the verge of a new reality and feeling it for the first time was a gut clenching moment. I guess Peace Corps has been lingering on the periphery of my mind for so long that it is a comfortable possibility, but it had not started to translate to emotional reality yet because all of the other changes felt familiar so far. I expect to hit more and more of these moments in the next month.

Just to be complete, here’s an update: We have both quit our jobs. We have left all our volunteer work behind. We have packed, cleaned and closed the house. We packed the 16 foot moving truck, and the station wagon (which we hauled to VA) and the back of the beetle. We left for VA 24 hours later than we had hoped because we are slower than we expected (well, honestly it is because Kevin is an optimist…April knew that we would not be getting out of there that soon J With in 4.5 hours of arriving in VA we had sold our station wagon (we listed it here before we left MD, but we couldn’t get it sold in MD). We unloaded just over ½ the truck, we reloaded some stuff and then planted the plants that we brought from our yard. We are just over ½ way through the move and I am tired.

Thanks to the folks that helped us load the truck: Jeff, Bill, Pat, Rebecca, Pamela, Jim, Meg, & Justin. Thanks to Dad Cropper who worked like a workhorse to unload my heavy furniture. Thanks to all of our Parents for keeping so much of our stuff for 2+ years.

What April is looking forward to (and not looking forward to):

Looking forward to:

• Having life be simple – I have a hard time not over extending sometimes
• Missing the 2008 US presidential election hoopla…or at least the worst of it since it has already started
• Seeing the Panamanian presidential election process
• Learning to cook new foods and use new spices
• Seeing what a real “heavy rain” is (they measure it in feet – not inches – in some areas)
• Learning and using Spanish daily
• Not living in an airport flight path
• Not driving for two years – letting the Maryland driver’s angst seep out of my soul
• Not seeing Christmas commercials daily- starting in October
• Reading about the USA from an outside perspective
• Doing a lot of walking
• Possibly living without easy access to electricity
• Going snorkeling sometime
• Seeing the Panama Canal
• Seeing orchids and leaf cutter ants
• Learning a tiny bit about birds and birding
• Visiting the peak were you can see the ocean on both sides
• Spending lots of quality time with Kevin

Not looking forward to:

• Vaccination shots
• Mosquitoes
• Diarrhea
• Missing family events- major and small
  
• Increasing my banana consumption levels (arg)
• Waiting for 1-2 months for mail
• High humidity (Think Baltimore summers year round – evening LOW around 70)
• Wearing lots of sunscreen

Parties and our schedule until we leave

With just one more week of real work, less than a month in Maryland, and just five weeks in the US, we're about to the point where we have a schedule for each day remaining. And that includes two parties, so read on for details!

In Maryland, we'll be having a goodbye party at our house on Saturday, 21 April, and you'll get a chance to meet both of our parents. The house isn't huge, but swing by anytime after 4pm. We'll take advantage of daylight hours (and hopefully good weather) and go until late. We're on a cul-de-sac, so park in our driveway if there's room or anywhere along Harp String (other than the inside of the circle) or Bright Soul. (7167 Harp String, Columbia, MD 21045. From Snowden River Parkway, turn onto Carved Stone - Starbucks/Supreme Sports Club - and go past Hunan Manor/under the powerlines, then RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT. We're at the end of the cul-de-sac.)

The rest of our time in Maryland includes an MLS game, MSAR FTL testing, final doctor and dentist visits, selling the wagon (not the veggie car, that's the Beetle), an awards dinner for April for her volunteer work with youth through MSAR, paperwork, and packing. Sometimes it seems like we have a lot to do, sometimes it seems like we have a lot of time.

My last official day of work is 1 May and that afternoon/evening, we'll load the truck (volunteers appreciated :). On the 2nd, we drive to Kevin's folk's in Lexington, VA and unload furniture and have our first chance to relax for a couple of days, before we drive to April's folk's in Bethel, OH on 5 May.

That week in the Cincy area, we'll see Grandma Cropper (8-9 May), Grandma Miller and Grandma & Grandpa Dierks (9-11 May), as well as other Cincy relatives, before the second party, on our last Saturday. April's folks will be hosting a goodbye party at the Bethel Community Center in Bethel, Ohio on Saturday, 12 May starting around 5pm. Email for more details if you're going to be in Ohio around then.

While we don't yet have any details (hopefully in the next couple of weeks), we anticipate that on 13 May, we fly from Cincy to our staging, which we've heard a rumor might be in Miami. We spend two days there doing paperwork, getting shots, meeting everyone, and then fly to Panama City on the 15th, and the full adventure begins!